Hey Jenna, thank you do this post. I've come to it nearly a month after you posted it but this is what I've been grappling with right now as well. All I want right now is comfort. All I'm craving for is comfort. I needed this reminder - a congruent life is also about creating more comfort in your life. I hope you have been walking in comfort in 2024.
Thank you so much, Shobaa! ❤️ I'm really glad this message resonated with you. I deeply believe that we all need a foundation of comfort. May you know more comfort than you could even imagine.
Ah I think I am one of those people that is seeking comfort Jenna, just the kind that is going to let me know it’s going to be ok. I think that’s very different from having to prove that you can stretch yourself, I’ve done enough of that for the time being. What comes through loud and clear is it’s ok to want comfort, for your own healing, your own respite, your own health and alignment. It’s ok to rest easy for a while in that space and let everything settle. There is time, there is so much time. 🙏💫
Yes, this, thank you so much, Louise. That's beautiful! And I keep wondering who is this authority figure that we feel we have to prove ourselves to in the first place? I LOVE that you said "there is time, there is so much time." This gave my whole being a big, giant, spacious sigh. There is so much time. I feel like I want to put that on post-its around my whole house. Thank you for that, my friend! ❤️
Reading you post Jenna has raised a bunch of thoughts...I am brought to the liminal. On one side is an over indulgence in comfort seeking, hiding. The other is constant risk taking, over achieving. Or simply put clinging vs pushing. Yet as you brought forward there is a sweet spot. The liminal. And ironically I find it can't be stagnant, it too must shift with the times. For me there is a comfort zone that is needed, especially after a big change and when integration needs to happen. The zone widens to accommodate that. Then when its time to expand and grow I come to a place of discontent. The container has become to tight, the zone is no longer serving me. Then I step out beyond it, stretch myself in new ways. Which builds resilience as you said, and also brings in new insights and understandings. Then time to integrate again, and the comfort zone widens once more. An ongoing shifting. Jenna, I really enjoyed this post. Thanks for the contemplation!
Thanks Julie for your concept of "ongoing shifting." I feel like this has been the missing ingrediant of what I've been thinking about comfort as well. Very well put.
Thank you, Julie! So insightful and beautiful as always. I love the image of the undulating comfort zone, like it's breathing. That's exquisite and an image I plan to meditate on. ❤️ For me, I've come to realize that I tend to be more motivated by going towards something than away from something (this not the case across the board. If I have a migraine, for example, I'm very much motivated by getting away from the pain.) So, in very broad terms, I tend to be less motivated to change through discomfort and find that I prefer to change within the container of comfort. Then this makes me wonder all over again where this idea that we have to be uncomfortable in order to grow first began. I suspect you have some profound answers and so we'll add this to the ever-growing list of discussion topics.🤗 Let's schedule something soon! Maybe in April?
"getting this foundational place of comfort built, rooted, shored up, secured, and emplaced. It is from this place that I can then stretch into growth, enthusiasm, joy, and, if needed, resilience. I will know, all the while, that comfort is my foundation—my sanctuary—should I need it. But I have had to focus on building it first."
Sounds like a good goal.
There is a big difference between the need to invoke comfort and 'staying in your comfort zone'.
It sounds to me like you were very much in the discomfort zone, in which case invoking comfort is a fundamental need. Thanks for sharing 💕🙏
I actually had a post planned precisely about the phoniness of the slogan that we must get out of your comfort zone. I totally totally agree with your point, there is no need to whip ourselves just to - what? Get the big prize for how big heroes we are? We need to treat ourselves as we do our loved ones; why do we so often treat ourselves in ways we would never do to others?
Speaking about “zones”, there’s also a so-called Zone of proximal development in modern pedagogy, where the learning takes place; but the gap needs to be just right, not too wide or it will stifle learning. And those of us who’ve learnt anything know that you cannot “learn” each day: there’s also practice, consolidation, revision, recycling - and THEn yes, take a new jump outside your familiar matrix, but not too far off!
Thank you for another post that echoes so deep within me.
Thank you so much for this, Zoe! I had to look up the zone of proximal development and, although I only read a brief summary of it, I really like that it included the idea of learning from another. That brings relationality into it, which is what I'm all about, but hadn't applied to this idea of a comfort zone. During those times when life circumstances force us out of our comfort zone, that could be when we turn to supportive others instead of "getting the big prize for how big heroes we are" (love that quote of yours! ❤️) And you are SO right that we then need the part of the cycle that includes all the aspects of metabolizing the learning and putting it into practice. That's so insightful!
I can't wait to read your post about the phoniness of getting out of our comfort zones...I'll keep a look out for it. 🤗
Hey Jenna, thank you do this post. I've come to it nearly a month after you posted it but this is what I've been grappling with right now as well. All I want right now is comfort. All I'm craving for is comfort. I needed this reminder - a congruent life is also about creating more comfort in your life. I hope you have been walking in comfort in 2024.
Thank you so much, Shobaa! ❤️ I'm really glad this message resonated with you. I deeply believe that we all need a foundation of comfort. May you know more comfort than you could even imagine.
Ah I think I am one of those people that is seeking comfort Jenna, just the kind that is going to let me know it’s going to be ok. I think that’s very different from having to prove that you can stretch yourself, I’ve done enough of that for the time being. What comes through loud and clear is it’s ok to want comfort, for your own healing, your own respite, your own health and alignment. It’s ok to rest easy for a while in that space and let everything settle. There is time, there is so much time. 🙏💫
Yes, this, thank you so much, Louise. That's beautiful! And I keep wondering who is this authority figure that we feel we have to prove ourselves to in the first place? I LOVE that you said "there is time, there is so much time." This gave my whole being a big, giant, spacious sigh. There is so much time. I feel like I want to put that on post-its around my whole house. Thank you for that, my friend! ❤️
Reading you post Jenna has raised a bunch of thoughts...I am brought to the liminal. On one side is an over indulgence in comfort seeking, hiding. The other is constant risk taking, over achieving. Or simply put clinging vs pushing. Yet as you brought forward there is a sweet spot. The liminal. And ironically I find it can't be stagnant, it too must shift with the times. For me there is a comfort zone that is needed, especially after a big change and when integration needs to happen. The zone widens to accommodate that. Then when its time to expand and grow I come to a place of discontent. The container has become to tight, the zone is no longer serving me. Then I step out beyond it, stretch myself in new ways. Which builds resilience as you said, and also brings in new insights and understandings. Then time to integrate again, and the comfort zone widens once more. An ongoing shifting. Jenna, I really enjoyed this post. Thanks for the contemplation!
Thanks Julie for your concept of "ongoing shifting." I feel like this has been the missing ingrediant of what I've been thinking about comfort as well. Very well put.
Thank you, Julie! So insightful and beautiful as always. I love the image of the undulating comfort zone, like it's breathing. That's exquisite and an image I plan to meditate on. ❤️ For me, I've come to realize that I tend to be more motivated by going towards something than away from something (this not the case across the board. If I have a migraine, for example, I'm very much motivated by getting away from the pain.) So, in very broad terms, I tend to be less motivated to change through discomfort and find that I prefer to change within the container of comfort. Then this makes me wonder all over again where this idea that we have to be uncomfortable in order to grow first began. I suspect you have some profound answers and so we'll add this to the ever-growing list of discussion topics.🤗 Let's schedule something soon! Maybe in April?
"getting this foundational place of comfort built, rooted, shored up, secured, and emplaced. It is from this place that I can then stretch into growth, enthusiasm, joy, and, if needed, resilience. I will know, all the while, that comfort is my foundation—my sanctuary—should I need it. But I have had to focus on building it first."
Sounds like a good goal.
There is a big difference between the need to invoke comfort and 'staying in your comfort zone'.
It sounds to me like you were very much in the discomfort zone, in which case invoking comfort is a fundamental need. Thanks for sharing 💕🙏
I actually had a post planned precisely about the phoniness of the slogan that we must get out of your comfort zone. I totally totally agree with your point, there is no need to whip ourselves just to - what? Get the big prize for how big heroes we are? We need to treat ourselves as we do our loved ones; why do we so often treat ourselves in ways we would never do to others?
Speaking about “zones”, there’s also a so-called Zone of proximal development in modern pedagogy, where the learning takes place; but the gap needs to be just right, not too wide or it will stifle learning. And those of us who’ve learnt anything know that you cannot “learn” each day: there’s also practice, consolidation, revision, recycling - and THEn yes, take a new jump outside your familiar matrix, but not too far off!
Thank you for another post that echoes so deep within me.
Thank you so much for this, Zoe! I had to look up the zone of proximal development and, although I only read a brief summary of it, I really like that it included the idea of learning from another. That brings relationality into it, which is what I'm all about, but hadn't applied to this idea of a comfort zone. During those times when life circumstances force us out of our comfort zone, that could be when we turn to supportive others instead of "getting the big prize for how big heroes we are" (love that quote of yours! ❤️) And you are SO right that we then need the part of the cycle that includes all the aspects of metabolizing the learning and putting it into practice. That's so insightful!
I can't wait to read your post about the phoniness of getting out of our comfort zones...I'll keep a look out for it. 🤗
What an inspiring post, Jenna. I especially resonate with the difference between being resilient and the need for resilience on a daily basis.
Thank you, Priya! I agree, I have a hard time believing in the idea that life is meant to be perpetually difficult.